Well it’s happened again! How old am I?
Oi! ……That’s a bit rude!
That’s better, I’m 32.
“On a very dark night!”
Who said that?
How the Hell did that roll of disgustingness get itself attached round my waist so quickly? It’s only been about 10 minutes since I got rid of the little blighter last time!
Homing fat – ewww the very idea!
Nope! I simply can’t imagine how it happened!
I don’t suppose a whole winter of eating indiscriminate amounts of pretty much anything I like and miniscule amounts of exercise had very much to do with it.
I blame nature. It’s global warming stress syndrome. My body is naturally preparing itself for crisis!
Damn you body! Why can you never naturally prepare yourself for supermodel glamour!!
This is what I look like – IT IS!!!
Not THIS – Nooooooooo!
Really though! I should know better.
Now I’ll have to get on with getting into shape again pretty fast or yet another summer will be spent in an ‘arty’ selection of diaphanous kaftans and ‘romantic’ floaty shirts.
Right that’s it! The gauntlet is down (well it doesn’t fit my chubby hands at the moment anyway!)
Sveldt for summer! Hmmmmmmmmmmm!
Have you ever thought you might have Belgian Blue in your genes? If so you may have trouble getting in calf, but don’t worry, I’ll see you roight, Arrrrr, meet me in the yards tonight and for Gawds sake make sure you don’t tell that ghastly sheep Shorn Cornery, I don’t want him buggering up my date again.
Not that he actually buggered my…oh never mind.
By: Bruce Brucelosis on November 19, 2009
at 2:54 pm
Waaaaaaaaaa, don’t go near that Brucelosis Tosser, before you know it, you’ll be on your back being wormed and shorn.
By: Shorn Cornery on November 19, 2009
at 2:56 pm
I don’t know the exercise might do me good.
By: Arty on November 20, 2009
at 7:10 am
I’ll give you some exercise moi little pudding…arrrr
By: Bruce Brucelosis on November 20, 2009
at 7:57 am
I’m telling you now you don’t want to be drenched by Bruce
By: Shorn Cornery on November 20, 2009
at 7:58 am
Shut up Shorn, you are such a kill-joy – this is the best offer I’ve had in decades!
By: Arty on November 20, 2009
at 8:04 am